It's About Time

So I haven't really been updating very well on blogger, but what else is new?  Since it's 2:45 am and baby Bird is fighting sleep tooth and nail, rather loudly at that, I'd just as soon not be in the same room.  Hence the sudden catch-up blog posts.

I'll try and do a series of posts so I can get all caught up.

Here they are:
Topic #1:  Return from Deployment
Topic #2:  Our Decision


Topic #1:  Return from Deployment

I should have done this post when this was all fresh in my mind, and I wrote several posts in my head that sounded just lovely.  Time's past and the raw emotions and quirks of my husband's homecoming have faded but I will try and include at least the highlights.

• My husband came home from his 4-month deployment about 2 months ago.
• With him came all the joys and adjustments of having Daddy and husband home again.
• Joys were:
• Sharing the bed again! (umm, duh)
• No more worrying about his safety, even if there isn't much to worry about I always do
• Seeing baby Bird light up and giggle the whole way home once she could actually see who it was (it was dark when we picked him up)
• Spending some much-needed family time together (LOVE those 10 days of post-deployment leave!)
• Mini-vacation to Tokyo and skiing
• Not having to be the only one responsible for walking the dog, doing the shopping, and keeping the house running.  Especially the dog part.  I like sleeping in the mornings, not getting fully dressed just so I can walk the dog down the stairs to pee.
• Adjustments were:
• Sharing the pillows again.  I'd become quite the pillow hog in 4 months...
• Learning how to connect in person with baby Bird since she'd grown quite a bit while Daddy was gone.
• Reworking how we parent as a team - no glitches really, just learning the daily rhythm and flow as well as sharing what boundaries had been set, etc.  We did pretty well on communicating this stuff while Daddy was deployed so it was a pretty smooth transition I think.  It might have been different if baby Bird was older.
• Sleeping.  I had terrible sleep patterns during the deployment.  Unfortunately it took several weeks after my husband got home before I was kindof into a decent routine.  That part sucked.

I know there were tons of other things I wanted to include in the homecoming posts, but between the passage of time and the wee-hour morning this is about all I've got.  Sorry :-/.  I'm sure my memory will be jogged on some things in the next few weeks given our current situation, which I will share in my next post.  Peace! :)

What Would You Do?

We're stuck.  Here's the situation:

• As far as we know there is no danger to us or our area due to the earthquakes and aftermath.  We're safe here.
• The government has authorized essentially an all-expenses-paid round-trip to our location of choice anywhere in the States.
• We're not likely to come back for at least 30 days, and I would guess longer.
• We JUST did a deployment.  My husband's only been back less than 2 months and this trip would mean being separated again for a time TBD.
• We have family in the States that would really love the opportunity to spend time with their grandbaby.
• This authorization has the potential to be cancelled at any time, meaning we lose our opportunity to go for free.
• I don't really want to go but don't know that we can pass up the chance to spend time with extended family.
• The trade-off is being separated from our immediate family (Daddy).
• There's a one-year-old baby that's going to be affected strongly by any decision we make.

We're stuck.  Praying and thinking and trying to figure out answers.  What would you do?

All Tied Up

This is a post about the recent Japan earthquakes, tsunami, and recovery efforts since then.  If you're tired of hearing about them then quit reading HERE.  Quit watching the news too, it's being hyped up.






OK, now that that's out of the way.

Here's the deal, I'm not real sure what to do or think.  I'm not one to worry; in fact it takes quite a bit to shake me up in an emergency.  My husband is the same way.  Our family teases us because we tend to be so laid back that at times it seems an act of God is required to get us moving.  So I really haven't been all that worried about the current situation in Japan.  Not that I'm not concerned, it's just that I haven't been losing sleep over it.  We live in an area that has been relatively untouched, or at least undamaged, by the natural disasters of last week and the ongoing aftershocks.  The biggest issue physically has been the non-stop aftershocks that people here are still feeling.  Even that though hasn't really affected our family because we live low enough to the ground that we haven't felt most of them.  This is a huge blessing since I get motion sickness if I ride in a car for 30 minutes.  4 days of swaying would cause me to puke.  A lot.

Unfortunately people are stupid.  Or rather, people aren't stupid but they do stupid things and make stupid choices.  Case in point: on MONDAY the Commissary had a run on water, batteries, and flashlights.  Dude, nothing changed between Saturday and Monday that would necessitate everyone suddenly stocking up on water.  And you should always have a flashlight, period.  Note that the base wasn't actually OUT of water, they just had empty water shelves for a few hours since people bombarded the Commissary.  This base has enough supplies to get us through a lot more than a day or two's shortage of water.  That's the military's job - BE PREPARED.  It's like the Boy Scouts on steroids.

It's also the military's job to prevent their service members, families, etc. from panicking.  So far I've been relatively impressed with the speed in which our Command has relayed information.  I think they've done a pretty good job of getting information out to the base community in an effort to dispel rumors and put minds at ease.  I know it's helped me.

However, I also know that when in a position of leadership, it's never wise to state that a problem exists unless you're prepared with a solution.  This is where I'm kindof stuck.  I would be lying if I said I was confident the military is sharing ALL the information with us.  I AM confident they will take care of us and I guess that's really the bottom line; it's just a bit disconcerting to hear so many rumors fly and really not be able to do anything about them.

So I guess here's the bottom line:  We're doing our best to stay calm and objective while we prepare mentally and physically for possible sudden changes.  God is good and I know He takes care of us all, whether it's in the way we wish or not.  Please continue to pray for the health and safety of the people of Japan, but please also pray for level heads and peace in all our hearts.  I think that peace alone would go a long way toward dispelling some of the challenges that have arisen since Saturday.

Day at the Doctor's

We went in this morning for a follow-up on little Bird's 12-month well-baby.  Appointment time?  9am.  Final departure from the hospital? 1:45 pm.  Why?  Well, apparently our baby is shrinking.  On her birthday she clocked in at 19 lbs 6 oz.  Today she was 19 lbs 2 oz.  Down 4 oz.  The point of the follow-up was to show she was actually growing.  Dang.  Sortof.

The doctor is concerned enough that he ordered a blood workup and urinalysis just to rule out unhealthy reasons for her weight loss.  Fine, I don't have a problem with that.  He's not suggesting we make any dietary changes, just that we monitor her until she "picks her own growth curve."  Blood workup on a 1-year-old means me holding her on my lap, pinning one hand, hugging her around her chest so she can't squirm away, and having a tech hold down little Bird's free arm while another tech ties off the turniquette and draws the blood.  Oh yeah, it was just as much fun as it sounds.  Bird started squalling before they even got the needle close.  The tech holding her arm commented, "She's strong!"  Yeah, coulda' told you that.  She doesn't like being pinned down and poked either.  At least it was fast.  I sang to little Bird and fought back tears.

Nursing break.  Not sure who needed it more - little Bird or me.  Did I mention we were already an hour past her nap time?

Next was the Immunization Office.  5 pokes were on the schedule for today.  I got it down to 3.  Bird's not a drug user, and I'm pretty sure we'd notice if she was having sex with multiple partners, so no thanks on the Hep A.  Flu shots are a bit of a crap shoot in my opinion, so we forgo them unless required for work.  Down to 4 sticks.  Last one I declined was the Chicken Pox vaccine.  Given the statistics and data I've researched I'd rather she just get the Chicken Pox and be done with it.  3 pokes.  She was as happy about those ones as the blood draw.  This was turning into quite the day.

Two hours past her naptime.  Lunch break - I'm starving and she's exhausted.  We left long enough to get lunch and nap then came back so see if we'd collected enough pee.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the bag.  Have you ever tried to collect pee from a baby?  Well apparently they've thought this one through at least a little.  I won't go into the details, but suffice it to say it was a pain.  And we had to do it twice since the first time we missed and the pee hit the diaper instead.  Fun stuff.

So all of this is because she's been losing weight.  Not an insane amount, but enough that we've had plenty of people comment on it and the doctor wants to watch her.  I will point out that the last time we had her weighed was at her roly-polyest right before she started walking.  She started walking early - at 9 months.  She's getting around pretty well these days.  All the time in fact.  So I'm not surprised she's thinning out.  It just might not be good if she continues to thin out.

Today's appointment spurred me on to do some more research and this is what I found:
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/vitamins/babyfoodcalories.html


I had assumed little Bird was losing weight due to increased activity, which is very much a part of it I think.  However, she's actually started losing weight FASTER since she increased the amount of solid foods she was eating.  Based on the chart, that makes sense.  Her belly can only handle so much food at a time, be it milk or solid foods.  If she is eating solid foods INSTEAD of breastmilk, then she is actually getting fewer calories (and fats and nutrients, etc.).

So, I think we're going to work on INCREASING the number of nursing sessions per day and see how that goes.  I'm not so much concerned about her size or her health, but I am mildly concerned about the prospect of her weaning earlier than I think is healthy.  At the rate she's inhaling table foods this could be a possibility.  I see no point in having her wean, then having to give her cow's milk to replace the lost fat, calories, and nutrients.  That's ridiculous.  Hopefully she'll slow down the weight loss a little bit and start growing out as well as up so we can just go on our merrily-nursing way.

Earthquake and Tsunami

We're okay here.  BIG earthquakes today.  Prayers for the safety of those in harder-hit areas!

Main quake was 8.9 at the center and hit at 2:45pm. It was about a 5 here.  The second and third ones were about 20 mins later--both 6.4 at the epicenter.

Airports have been closed, planes have been diverted, trains are down, people are stranded all over the place.  We'll have more info tomorrow I imagine, but for now please just pray.

Can I Get a Do-Over?

Our house is a pit.  Why?  Because we have too much STUFF and no place to store it all.  But we're slowly chipping away at the masses and mounds and boxes and bogs I mean bags that are taking over our apartment.  We're actually doing quite well considering in the last two years we've moved from a 4-bedroom house to a 2-bedroom apartment halfway around the world, had a baby, and said baby has reached toddlerhood and all its toy-induced chaos.  For example, we've discovered Flylady and have been "flinging" things for months.  At the rate we're running I figure it'll only take another 10 years or so to find our closets.  Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention that most of our STUFF is actually in storage in the States, so make that 20 years of flinging.  Oh well, it's good exercise.

Anyway, we decided that to at least organize our STUFF and get it off the floor where it's been for the last 2 years we ought to put up some shelves.  Enter the BX's single most affordable shelf.  I mean really, who on a military income can afford to shell out the $1000 marked on most of the furniture on base?  So yeah, $40 some-assembly-required BX special coming right up.

I am a capable woman.  I learned how to change a tire when I was 10 and the oil in the car around 12.  I can fix leaky pipes, build tv cabinets from scratch, and did backflips when we got a circular saw one year for Christmas.  I learned most of what I know from my mother, a mechanic/seamstress/jack-of-all-trades single mom - the kind that makes the world go 'round when nobody else feels like it or can't seem to get their acts together, and she does it all with a smile.  Amazing.  Bring on the philip's head and screws.

30 minutes and several trips to chase down missing hardware and tools that Little Bird decided to "help" carry all over the house later, this is what we ended up with:

Notice anything amiss?  How 'bout now:

Yeah.  Brilliant.  Guess we'll be doing this one again.

Lent

We are only one and a half days into Lent and I'm already struggling.  I guess that's the point but I had it in my head that it was going to be easier this year, that I was going to be able to follow my plan and do things on my terms.  God has a way of making sure we know Who's in charge and just how much He loves us.  I came across this today and it turned out to be just what I needed right now.  I hope it may help someone else too.

Why Do Lent?  Why a Failing Lent Actually Succeeds

Peace.

Priorities

My husband's comment when trying on his new gas mask:

"Oh yeah, I'm gonna sleep so well in this mask!"

Such are the priorities during exercises.

Weekly Roundup

Just a reminder - check it out if you haven't already!  Lots of great blogging going on :)

Cheerful Obedience

OK, so we're a bit behind the power curve but we have time to catch up.

Before I joined the ranks of mothers I was a teacher.  Big kids, little kids, everywhere-in-between kids, I taught them all at some point and in some manner.  Over the years I gathered up several ideas for my "bag of tricks" and started to become known as someone who could take nearly any kid-situation I was given and have it run smoothly.

Right before we moved to Japan I had one kindergarten class, and one student in particular, that pretty much took the cake for driving all the other teachers nuts with impulsive behaviors, aggressiveness, lack of focus, etc.  By the end of the semester we had everyone in ship-shape and happily working, at least most of the time.  How?  I'm stubborn.  Also?  Major shout-out to my aides!  LOVE THEM.

Anyway, when this "one student in particular" joined the class his mother asked me, with no little amount of shock, why we didn't lock the school's doors from the inside.  A bit mystified I said it was against the fire code and by the way why did she ask?  Well don't the students try to leave?  Ummm.... no, we've never really had a problem with that.  Well, you do now!  She wasn't kidding!

Every time this student saw a door he just had to go through it.  Every time he got within 2 feet of a classmate he just had to poke her.  Every time he got angry and there was paper nearby he just had to stuff it in his mouth.  Oh this was fun.

I am not a touchy-feely-let's-discuss-this-this-is-a-democracy kind of teacher.  Or parent.  Or person in general.  This kid lived in timeout for almost 3 weeks straight.  But ya' know what?  By the end of those three weeks we had a whole new child.  He was more in control of his own body and behavior, he joyfully participated in class, and the other staff working with him were awed at his transformation.

Kids crave boundaries.  They will push until they find them.  That's what they're hardwired to do.  Our job as teachers, parents, scout leaders, or whatever is to clearly set appropriate boundaries that allow for safe exploration and learning.

I know this.  I've mentored other parents and teachers on this.  I have followed through with this in more situations than I can count and it never fails to succeed.  Except one.

Yes, I am that parent.  You know, the one that gives a sheepish grin and lets her kid run wild?  The one who says "she's just so cute" as if it's a reason, not an excuse, to let stuff slide?  The one to which I'd previously been so ready to smugly point out her child's lack of boundaries and tips on how to handle it?  Guilty. as. charged.

But it's not too late.  Tonight is the night I am officially putting my foot down.  No more wild traipsing at night!  No more junk food at all hours! No more running through school doors and poking classmates! 

OK, so she doesn't really do any of those things.  She is only one after all.  But I did realize tonight that it's time we get our act together and start setting those boundaries that Little Bird so craves.  She's already started pushing and it's just taken awhile for us to take the hint.  Don't worry Little Bird, we'll be well on our way to guiding you toward cheerful obedience starting tomorrow morning.  We love you!

Daddy's Girl

Tonight we had stroganoff for dinner.  Little Bird carefully separated the noodles from the beef chunks and proceeded to eat every stitch of meat before touching any noodles.  She is soooooo daddy's little girl!

Trying

I've been struggling recently with a lot of base drama.  Normally it doesn't get to me, but there was a series of events that I could neither concientiously ignore nor get away from.  It resulted in withdrawing my participation in a group that until that point had been my most reliable source of spouse support, adult interaction, and time out of the house.  I have since found other avenues for support, interaction, and time away so I'm okay with those aspects of the change.  What I'm not okay with however is the nagging feeling of angry and helpless frustration following me around like a storm cloud waiting to break open.

I am well aware that I cannot change someone else's attitude or actions.  That's fine.  I can change mine.  This is a small community.  On a daily basis I am forced to face the situation, the people, and my decision.  Running away is not an option, so neither is ignoring the problem brewing beneath my skin.

"There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the One who is able to save and to destroy; but who are you who judge your neighbor?" -James 4:12

I am struggling to turn to the mirror so I can see the plank in my own eye.

Lord, please guide me in my thoughts, words, and actions.  Help me to love like you.  In You all things are possible.  Amen.